I have been thinking about my attitude toward losing chess games. As I read the other Knight blogs, I get the impression that losing is a universally unpleasant experience. This lines up nicely with my own attitude. I really hate to lose...but more than that, it bothers me to lose...almost enough to make me not want to play much.
So, now you'll be thinking, "This guy has a problem with his ego. He needs to get over it and get on with the game." Perhaps. I understand that losing is part of playing. I understand that to learn and improve I must play against stronger players and will therefore lose games. In fact, I understand that losing will make me a better player. That's why I'm flailing away at these #@$%* tactical problems, right? I want to be a better chess player.
Still, I hate to lose, and it bothers me every time it happens.
On the other hand, I think I'd quit faster if I always won every game I played. Never losing isn't interesting enough to keep my attention. I would certainly not put much effort into improving my play if I never lost.
I'm also not interested in playing if there is no winner and loser. I'm not especially captivated by chess as a "beautiful art form." I don't get much pleasure from the elegance of a combination. Sorry...call me an ignorant barbarian. Chess is a contest of minds. There is no such thing as an ugly win.
So...I really hate to lose...but I have to lose to stay interested. Strange.
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4 comments:
When I started with chess 8 years ago, I didn't bother to lose. But something strange has happened. If I win now, especially from a stronger player, I have an intense feeling of satisfaction and well being during a few days. Often lasting to the next game. When I lose though, I have a very hollow feeling for days. It must have something to do with chemicals like dopamine or so in the brains, I assume.
Perhaps there is no such thing as an ugly win but boy have I had some ugly loses. 8)
Dan Heisman wrote that attitudes about losing.Losing should not be so painful that it causes you to quit but painful enough that you are motivated to learn more to get better. (not in his exact words)
good luck
It was Heisman's comment I had in mind when I started wondering about how much I hate losing. I suspect this dislike of mine has a lot to do with why I don't play more, and thus don't improve more!
The flip side of this is also true as Tempo points out. When I win, life is GREAT!
Its interesting that you posted this entry. I just lost a game just now, and am not really willing to accept such a discomfort. In frustration, I searched losing in chess and found your post. My attitude toward the game has become this, I came in to play and master the game, but losing has become such a hindrance that I'm thinking I don't have the interest to continue with the game. My problem with chess is that when you lose its supposed to mean that the other person is smarter than you, but I find this absurd and think its why the game sometimes sends people to such madness and a somewhat strange complex of wanting to master it until they do not lose. I think what I'll do is only play live games, I've been playing over the internet where losing feels truly unacceptable, at least in person there is an element of gamesmanship to it, and you are losing to a person, not to the idea of never losing. If you are playing a person and lose, well, you can work on your game and play that person again, playfully I suppose, but to continually play chess to be the best, I don't know, sort of seems like madness to me.
Well thats just what I was thinking about the subject, thanks for the post.
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